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“Now. It stops now.”And I dropped him, and he fell, and he kept crying in a ball on the floor.I went to the bathroom and ran cold water. I went to the kitchen and ran hot water. I soaked two towels. I came back and got down with him, wiping his face – first with warm, then the cold – then back and forth, until he calmed.Then I got ice for his head.Then I pulled him up from the floor. He was heavy – non-compliant – defeated – drunk. It was messy. It reminded me of … me.That – and only that – gave me the strength to pull him up the stairs and into his room. I tossed him on his bed. He was mumbling now. Incoherently. “Handsome. Fucking handsome loser. Faggot.”I ignored that, knowing he was long gone and not sure whether he was referring to him or me.Off came the shoes. Then the pants. He resisted the shirt but I won, yanking it over his head. Fuck – I had to give the k** credit – he had a body by God. It was just this side of ripped, but not ripped, really, just heavy and thick and taut. '" Funny," Kirby said, almost wistfully. "That's the name your Mom and me would have given you if you'd been born a girl." He looked back over his shoulder again and smiled. "Alaina it is then." Thanks, Dad," Alan said. "I know it must seem weird and all, but—" —Actually not," Kirby broke in. "I mean, you were never one for football and baseball and all that guy-stuff. I knew that all along. It's just that, well, I just never knew how...feminine you were. I mean I knew, but now it's...just something else." Yah I know," Alan said, getting down the sugar and mixing some in a bowl with milk. "I was always trying to hide it, I guess. Now I just relax and let it be what it is. I didn't do much to myself, you know." I noticed," Kirby said. "With someone as completely pretty as you are.... He instantly regretted saying it quite that way, but continued, "Well, it doesn't take much I guess."He noticed his son/daughter nodding out of the corner of his eye. Then he saw Alan look up from stirring.
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